Rochelle: The Black Shinigami
by x-archsage-x
Summary: Rochelle releases her Zanpakuto; slaying the screaming Hollow who is now finally able to tell his fabled stories about Keith in Soul Society. One-shot parody of Rochelle, R&R and it might become multi-chapter...


(Play Music, optional!): Play the OST when instructed to later for better effect if you wish!: Bleach OST Reminiscence www. youtube watch?v=vAgYJNSiVh4

(To hear Rochelle's laugh: type in Rochelle's Laugh Sounds on Youtube , 0:10-0:16 is her cackle)

This is a Bleach/L4D2 Parody one-shot. Not too sure how many readers there are of this kinda crossover, but it needed to happen anyway, as you'll see later on! Enjoy ;)

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A petite woman stood above the Karakura Town skyline, balanced on a large pylon. Her hair was tied into a small yet frizzy ponytail, swaying gracefully in the cold wind of the night. She was one of the only few African American shinigami, as not many other souls from countries other than Japan ever graduated from the Academy, let alone be admitted to it.

She remained standing at the top of the pylon, her ragged Kimono hiding a Depeche Mode T-Shirt she bought from a specialist clothing store in the real world; which she had a natural affinity to for some reason. As most shinigami and souls, the memories from her past life were mostly erased, yet she still sometimes saw terrible visions of monsters chasing her in the streets of an unfamiliar place, while she fought back with something that even to this day she still wielded with deadly force; her zanpakuto.

She found it odd that she remembered her zanpakuto in her human existence, especially since she couldn't have had a zanpakuto as a human anyway, so why was it there in her visions? She never knew the answer, but theorized it was because the weapon she fought the monsters off with in her human life saved her so many times against the hordes of them, that she must have developed a bond with the weapon.

She looked down to the scabbard bound blade to the left of her kimono and smiled to it, remembering back once again to the amount of times it had saved her from the monsters of her previous life. Although the weapon was in its sealed form of a regular katana like most other shinigami, and that only when she released it did she see its familiar form, she knew she could rely on it with her life. Because of that, she was going to use its true form the next time she detected a Hollow, as a testament to that bond and for the sheer adrenaline of wielding the released weapon she so adored.

She felt something vibrating in her right hidden jean pocket beneath her kimono, disrupting her fond memories, and reached into it to retrieve her Shinigami phone. She saw a red dot pulsating on the screen about 1 mile north of her, which she could reach within seconds with her flash step.

She began to laugh to herself almost hysterically, excited to let her beloved zanpakuto slash monsters to death as always. She then used flash step northwards, while her eerie laugh echoed through the streets below, like a haunting banshee of the night.

She reached the location of the supposed Hollow, which was in the local park of the town. She looked around frantically for the monster, itching to murder it with her soon to be released Zanpakuto. She saw what she was looking for: a tall, clumsy-looking demon thats head was shaped as if it wore a baseball hat. She snickered with deadly intent when she saw the monster; her blood-lust becoming too much to handle as she reached for her Katana with her right hand.

She unsheathed the sword and laughed once again; haunting and almost reminiscent of a witch's cackle. She was perfectly suited for the 11th Squad, as her blood-lust really did match that of most of her colleagues. She held the Katana out with two hands and smirked at the hollow, itching to slay it already. She began to move closer to it, as the hollow surprisingly didn't act aggressively around her; but instead was mumbling to itself.

Ro' became irritated by the monster's lack of aggressiveness, as she wanted something to fully test her and her zanpakuto's bond with. She waited for a minute while standing about 10 metres from it, looking to it with perplextion to why it just stared at her while mumbling to itself.

She grinded her teeth, her impatience fueled by her desire to begin fighting. She was always accustomed to Hollows attacking her first, so she naturally waited for it to make the first move. However, now she was beyond blood-lust, and wanted to chop the hollow into small chunks as soon as she could to satiate that lust.

She gave in waiting, and began to charge the hollow to make it aggressive, only wanting to release her beloved zanpakuto when the hollow began attacking. She sprinted towards it with her Katana help steadfast, but was surprised when the Hollow's mouth opened to giant proportions, and began to blast out soundwaves so loud, even her love for Depeche Mode couldn't help her ears cope.

DID I EVER TELL YOU ABOUT THE TIME THAT KEITH... DID I EVER TELL YOU ABOUT THE TIME THAT KEITH... DID I EVER TELL YOU ABOUT THE TIME THAT KEITH... DID I EVER TELL YOU ABOUT THE TIME THAT-!

_"Sweet Jesus!"_

The black woman's ears began to ring as she fell to her knees, incapacitated by the incredible loud droning from the Hollow. It sounded sickeningly familiar to the woman, mostly due to it bringing about feelings of sorrow and hopelessness from hearing it, yet she didn't know why, or particularly cared as right now she was struggling to even stay on her knees. She looked up to see the slender hollows mouth still kept moving, telling a story of kinds that she couldn't even begin to comprehend. It was so loud that now even her blood-lust was beginning to dissipate; instead replaced with the struggle for survival.

Her vision blurred, but she looked to her zanpakuto and remembered the bond they shared with each-other, and that together they could stop the eternal noise of the familiar Hollow. She grasped the hilt of the blade and thrusted the sword into the ground, making a stable point for her to get back up. She struggled back to her feet and looked up to the hollow in front of her, figuring out a way to stop its loud story-telling so she could fight it properly.

Thankfully a barrage of visions assaulted her mind; almost in a truly psychic manner as she remembered a dilapidated room under a hotel during her life, where there were 3 men that she had to put up with.

_"Did I ever tell you about the time that Keith... Wait, I know this kid, He was in our group!"_

The black shinigami remembered the Hollows human identity, sighing as she knew that even in Human form this man was almost impossible to shut up.

_"W-Wait, I know the magic words!"_

She remembered once again that she had a magic-like way of dispelling his evil chatter; a phrase that she could utter to silence the man. She knew it worked in the human world, but hoped it would still work against his hollow form too, which she thought it would due to their similarities. The mans primary attack of shouting the story was probably due to his sorrow of never being able to tell it during his lifetime. Rochelle felt somewhat guilty for playing a part in suppressing his story telling, but knew that it had to be done both in the Human world and now, lest the fate of humanity would have been at risk.

"Way Of Binding, #0 :Ellis, sweety, can this wait?!"

The shinigami shouted, an aura of spirit pressure blasting from her. The hollow stopped right in his oral tracks, standing dumbfounded at the black woman's magic. She smirked in an evil manner, knowing this was her time to exact revenge on the hollow for stopping her release her zanpakuto before. She was also somewhat happy that the man would go to Soul Society after he was slayed, but she was more excited about the actual slaying itself.

"I think it's time I end this!"

The woman pulled her Katana out from the ground and held in front of her; the horrific cackle yet again emerging as purple spirit pressure loomed from her. She opened her mouth, ready to speak the short phrase to finally release her zanpakuto.

(Play Music!)

She looked one more time to the hollow, remembering and reminiscing over their past together slaying monsters, but knew right now that not only was _he_ the monster who needed purging, but that her sword couldn't stand to be in its form forever, and so she released it with great ecstasy in her voice, ready to commence with the killing.

**"Axe me a question... I DARE YOU!"**

**A huge blast of energy, thick enough to obscure the area emerged from the Katana, coating the town in a nightmarish aura. A figure emerged from the huge burst of energy, holding a red Fire-Axe in her hands. The Hollow looked terrified, running in the other direction to try and escape his certain death. She snickered and placed the Axe handle to touch the ****ground, the purple aura intensifying. **

**"This is it for you... by the beard of Zeus, Final Slash!"**

**The Hollow Ellis turned around dumbly, and saw Rochelle's Fire-Axe had begun to emit a strange power, but before the Hollow could begin to run again she had picked the Axe up and sprinted to his direction, laughing hysterically once more. The Axe chopped straight into the hollow's arm and it finished slicing into half its body, the hollow screaming in agony, Its life-energy being absorbed by the vampiric Axe and back to its black master. She began to foam at the mouth from all the energy she absorbed from him, showing her to truly be one of the most disturbed members of Squad 11, if not the entire universe.**

**She swung her released Axe once more into the Hollow, and chopped it in two, her disturbed cackle escalating as the Hollow began to disappear eventually into Soul Society; unfortunate for those who Ellis does revive near to. She then began to lick the blade of the Axe, absorbing the final remnants of the monster while her eyes rolled back in ecstasy.**

**(Stop Music)**

Her sadistic pleasures were however interrupted, as a man with striking Orange hair was almost teleporting towards her, which must have been flash step she thought. She embraced her axe once more before sealing it back its Katana form, not wishing to look entirely neurotic in front of others. She however began to flash-step away back to the nearest Senkai Gate to return to the barracks in Soul Society; her hysterical cackle still haunting the town, while the orange haired man scratched his head from seeing such an enigma vanish as hauntingly to match.

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a/n: Well there it was! Leave a review if you enjoyed seeing nutty Rochelle's Fire-Axe officially slay Ellis, canon style for the crossover of course. ;)


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